Birds have been getting a bad press in recent times. First, we had the Battle of Trafalgar, in which pigeon-feeders were banned by Mayoral dictat. Then came Bird Flu, with the prospect of early death for millions of Britain's chickens, without the honour of being covered in bread crumbs and eaten afterwards.

Now, news reaches us that racing pigeons are the subject of increasing attack "We used to get one or two cases a year, but suddenly we've had a flurry in a very short space of time," said Peter Bryant, of the Royal Pigeon Racing Association. "There's no doubt that this is a national problem."

Chickens and pigeons are the most visible targets, but I've been witness to firework attacks on seagulls and towards the end of every year, there's a horrendous ritual mass slaughter of turkeys.

What lies behind this gathering purge of our feathered friends? Here are a few theories: children learn at school that birds are dinosaurs and fall prey to a kind of pan-mammalian revenge; traffic jams and speeding fines make us more jealous than ever of the gift of flight; the gift of flight having been won by dirt-cheap airlines, we can now sneer at birds all the more easily; the dawn chorus reminds us of annoying mobile-phone ring-tones, and Sesame Street with Big Bird isn't on TV much anymore.

Whatever the ultimate cause, birds have started a fight-back. When they come to right the history of all this, they'll date the start of The Birds II - Retribution to last night when some pigeon-jihadist dropped his load all over my head and back. "But I was anti-war!" I yelled at the sky. The sky didn't listen and I went in to eat my KFC.

David Clee

City Hotel***(The City)
Innovative in both location and style of accommodation, the City Hotel has rightly won plaudits from both business and tourist travellers. Unusually, it also boasts a large car park with limited coach space on offer. UKP75 - UKP105

The Commodore***(Hyde Park)
Keenly priced, lavishly refurbished, 4 star hotel close to Hyde Park. This privately owned hotel is ideal for families and business travellers. Superb location for sights, restaurants and shops.
Single - UKP82.00
Double/Twin - UKP95.00

St. James*****(Park Place)
The St James's Club & Hotel takes luxury seriously. In a quiet cul-de-sac off St James's Street, the Club & Hotel is the perfect getaway for those who love the capital but value protection from its hustle and bustle.

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Free updates of available rooms/tenants in your area.

The Hempel *****(Craven Hill Gardens)
The Hempel, West London's stunning Boutique hotel, created by acclaimed British designer Anouska Hempel, is an architectural statement in original design. Simple and minimalist, The Hempel is a new experience in hotel living.
Studio Apartment Double - UKP245.00
Superior Double - UKP287.88

The Gore***(South Kensington)
One of London's most popular privately run hotels, The Gore first opened its doors in 1892 as an annexe to the neighbouring Queen's Gate Mansions Hotel. The Gore offers old fashioned comfort with up-to-date facilities and is justly famous for its mellow surroundings and intelligent, friendly staff. Single - UKP136.00; Double - UKP168.03

The Willett***(Sloane Square)
The Willett is a dignified Victorian hotel with the ornate carvings, mosaics and chandeliers to prove it. It has also moved fast enough with the times to have attracted a long list of regulars, while its rooms retain the spirit of old.
Double - UKP90
Deluxe - UKP110

Lincoln House ** (Marble Arch)
Built at the end of the 18th Century, in the time of King George III, the Lincoln House Hotel offers Georgian charm with modern comforts.

London Hotel Chart
(23/2/06 - 9/3/06)
1) Earl's Court Studios
2) Lord Jim Hotel
3) Boulevard Hotel
4) Shellbourne Hotel
5) Somerset Bayswater

Hotel Sidi San Juan*****
Playa de Sam Juan, Alicante, Spain
Situated directly on the beautiful large sandy beach of San Juan, set amongst lush tropical gardens and only 5 minutes from Alicante City, Hotel Sidi San Juan offers a high standard of comfort and quality with a fabulous sea view, terrace, air conditioning and television.

Click here for more worldwide hotels...

Super-Strength Lager Banned
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Paris at the turn of the 20th century was a bustling hub of art culture - and none enjoyed and explored it more than the likes of a vibrant group of ex-pat Americans. John Singer Sargent, John White Alexander, Mary Cassat and James Whistler are all featured in this thorough and delicately poised Americans In Paris exhibition - which is at the National Gallery from 22 February - 21 May 2006.

You can win a pair of tickets to do your own exploration. All you must do? Answer the following question:

Question: The above picture was painted by which of the following artists? (Hint: hover over it with your mouse!)
a) Alexander John White
b) White John Alexander
c) John White Alexander

How to Enter: Send an email with the correct answer to editorial@londonnet.co.uk, with the Subject "Americans In Paris Compie." You must include your name, email address, telephone number and postal address, to be considered for the prize.

More Necessary Info:
- NB MUST include name, email, telephone number and postal address (which will only be used for this compie only - guaranteed). If you don't include your details we can't send you info about the prize!
- First correct answer out of the Editor's hat wins the prize
- Details will be sent to the winners
- LondonNet is not responsible for prize distribution
- The Editor's decision is final

Closing Date: Noon, Wednesday 23rd March, 2006.

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