WHAT'S UP - What's new on LondonNet
LONDON FOR FREE:
THEATRE COMPIE - The Big One
Win an all-inclusive theatre package for two including return
rail travel, theatre tokens, hotel accommodation plus loads of
Click here for competition
CLUBS: Xmas and New Year
Read our guide to the
best selection of club nights for the Christmas and New Year
LONDON DIARY by David Clee
A Clown in Our Midst
There was a clown at the bus
stop one morning this week. Not some clumsy amateur in fancy
dress, but a genuine, baggy-trousered, thick-lipsticked member
of the falling down club, quietly smoking a cigarette.
When I got to work I hurried
to the desk of our theatre guru, who assured me she knew of no
Festival of Not Very Funny Physical Comedy about to stun London
and, as far as I know, circuses don't run a morning show, so
this could mean only one of two things. Either I had stumbled
apon a cunningly disguised Osama bin Laden, or this clown was
suffering from an inability to distinguish between reality and
The fact Coco fished out the
full 70 pence fare from his outsize pockets rather than a brown
envelope stuffed with anthrax would seem to suggest the latter;
a shame, in a way, because the reward for returning a runaway
clown to the circus is reckoned by military experts to be considerably
less than the 25 million Dollars on bin Laden's head. In another,
quite important life-and-death kind of a way, of course, it was
not such a shame.
Anyway, be it bin Laden or
Been Juggling, what I found amazing is that no-one else seemed
amazed by the clown in our midst. They all just carried on with
the usual harrumphing every time the bus had the temerity to
hold up their journey by stopping at, you know, bus stops.
I can promise you that I am
a long-term student of the meaning of minor muscle ticks of the
human face and can spot it a mile off when people are just pretending
to be uninterested. No, my fellow bus passengers were genuinely
blasé about the whole Clown In Unnatural Habitat incident.
It was then that I had one
of those dry-mouth moments of bitter self-knowledge. Even after
spending the best part of four decades in this city, I am still
not as cool as a bunch of old age pensioners on the downstairs
part of a double-decker bus. The clown in our midst was me.
David Clee ([email protected])
HOTEL NEWS by Peter D. Clee
It's Getting Better All
IT COULD be too early to call but I sense a certain return to
normalcy right now. The Taliban are toast, Tony Blair's finally
had a decent night's kip and Germany and Brazil really did qualify
for the World Cup, albeit eventually.
London hotel bookings are up
too. The air of desperation in the industry has been replaced
with a determination to pull together and get on with things.
Some hotels have chosen to close over the winter and undergo
substantial renovation. Others have slashed prices to maintain
occupancy levels. Even in a crisis it seems we all find a way
of coping and these troublesome times are proving no different.
I'm particularly pleased to
see that The Gore has picked up too. It's our longest
serving hotel and is particularly popular with our American cousins
so had thus seen it's share fall off considerably. Their champagne
filled New Year deal is worth a close look too.
I'm off to New York in a couple of weeks to take a look
at our new hotels in the city for our sister site Hotelgenie.
It's something I have been planning for a while and with greater
urgency ever since the 11th of September. I haven't been for
ages so I'm looking forward to meeting old friends and making
Drop me a line if you have
cool recommendations in the city, be they hotels, restaurants
or bars and clubs. Who knows, maybe a few of us can meet up (naturally
preference will be given to sassier members of the fairer sex...
yeah right; some chance, eh).
- Peter D. Clee ([email protected] / [email protected])
This week's hit-parade of the
most popular hotels featured in our secure-booking site:
LondonNet's Top Five
1 (2) The Columbia
2 (-) Hazlitts
3 (5) Lincoln
4 (4) Chesterfield
5 (-) Halcyon
(*based on bookings between 1-14
September 2001. Previous issue's figures in brackets)
For the full range of London hotels now on offer please see:
For details of our office hours and contact info see our Helpdesk
For details of over 300 European city hotels available on our
sister site Hotelgenie.com see:
Wishes: With a luxury hotel break up for grabs
in each issue plus features and news, it's time to get your copy
of Wishes, Hotelgenie.com's
regular newsletter. To subscribe click
LONDON MUSIC by Catherine Chambers
The White Stripes
Wednesday November 21
Unless you've been living under
a rock these past few months, you may have noticed that there's
a rock 'n' roll revolution going on. First it was New Yorkers
The Strokes that were hyped up to high heaven. Five smartly-dressed
young blokes that were as hip as they come. Now it's the turn
of Detroit's White Stripes. Except there's only two of them!
Jack White is one half of garage-rockers
The White Stripes. The other is his sister Meg. Their dress code
is red and (now here's a surprise) white. Instruments of choice
are guitar and drums only, but the bass isn't noticeably absent
thanks to JW's relationship with his six-stringer, shredding
like there's no tomorrow. And the way Meg belts those drums is
And they've mastered the art
of unbelievably catchy lyrics, ones that float around in your
subconscious. Such as those that make up the current single Hotel
Yorba - "Well it's one two three four, take the elevator
to the to the Hotel Yorba/I'll be glad to see ya later/all they
got inside is vacancy." You'll be singing it for days, trust
For the lucky blighters who've
managed to grab themselves a ticket, get ready to be blown away
at one of this year's highly anticipated gigs. For those that
missed out, well you'll just have to put up with pals banging
on about how amazing the White Stripes were. The words 'meteoric'
and 'rise' spring to mind. Watch them go.
Music Tickets: You can book tickets for many of the
top gigs in London through our online ticket shop:
For our music guide see: http://www.londonnet.co.uk/ln/out/music/index.html
by Helena 'Spid' Thompson
In the spotlight
'Much ado about nothing'? 'All's
well that ends well'? As theatreland rocks to the shock of September
11 even the Bard's words fail to ring true. Yet current productions
of Shakespeare say a lot about the state of London theatre.
Kiss Me, Kate is one show that positively sings the praises of
Shakespearean theatre. For a feelgood musical whose pathetic
pre-show sales had West End producers quaking in their seats,
Cole Porter's crowd-pulling revamp of The Taming Of The Shrew
has turned into a true success story.
But other versions of the Bard
tell a different tale. The Reduced Shakespeare Company's once
packed show is now half full as bomb shy tourists flee the theatre
- and even the solvency of the Royal Shakespeare Company looks
questionable. Will strikes prevent the RSC Hamlet from coming
to London? Will artistic director Adrian Noble actually desert
his Barbican base in favour of more West End shows?
Though no show has all the
answers Shakespeare on stage certainly promises plenty to think
about. Laughed, spoken or just plain said the Bard remains the
best barometer for a changing theatre scene.
Up and Coming
Umoja, The Shaftesbury Theatre, Holborn tube
A South African extravaganza to celebrate the spirit of togetherness.
All-singing, all-dancing performers bring village life to life.
Kiss Me Kate, the Albery Theatre, Leicester Square tube
Cole Porter's musical revamp of The Taming of the Shrew is back
from Broadway with a cluster of US stars. It's time to brush
up your Shakespeare.
Best Musical: Cats
- Lloyd Webber tames
Eliot's feline poems
Best Play: Art - The value of modern art throws relationships
- For details, tickets and reviews see: http://www.londonnet.co.uk/ln/out/ent/theatre.html
LondonNet's Top Five
1 (2) Starlight Express
2 (5) Art
3 (1) The Lion King
4 (-) Les Miserables
5 (-) Kiss Me Kate
(*based on bookings between 1-14
November 2001. Previous issue's figures in brackets)
London Theatre Menu
London Theatre Tickets
THEATRE: Group Bookings
OVER the past few months we have been doing an increasing number
of group bookings. So we thought it was about time LondonNet
had its own group booking page:
Group bookings normally require
between 10-15 in the party (depending on show) and usually attract
handsome discounts. If you are planning a works party, school
trip, birthday treat or laying on corporate hospitality please
get in touch.
Email: [email protected]
LONDON CLUBS by Catherine Chambers
Club Night of the week:
Chew The Fat
Friday, November 16
Venue: The Bar, St Matthews Church
This weekend it's all happenin'
down in Brixton as Chew The Fat celebrate their fourth birthday.
Resident DJ Paul Arnold is joined by Layo & Bushwacka and
Tayo dictating the sound of UK breaks at a tasty all-nighter
Brainchild of Paul Arnold,
Chew the Fat has been dishing up a wild mix of breakbeats since
1998. From nu-skool to young skool, CTF straddles all beat styles
and plays host to decknicians that'll have you dribbling. No
less than Adam Freeland (or Adam F as he's known as) a, Terry
Francis and Tom Middleton have ventured down to South London's
Clued up clubbers have been
heading down to the same venue every Friday night for the past
four years and you can bet they'll be doing the same this Friday
moreso considering that the birthday celebrations witness Layo
and Bushwacka making a rare joint appearance in London (other
than The End) to mark the occasion.
Are Yule Ready To Party?
- Check out LondonNet's guide to clubbing over Christmas and
Club Tickets - You can now book tickets for many
of the top clubs in London through our online ticket shop:
LONDON CINEMA by Catherine Chambers
Film of the Week:
Harry Potter and the Philosopher's
Director Chris Columbus
It would please the cynics greatly - and conform to a certain
industry tradition - if Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone
failed to live to the hype. Although the media circus surrounding
this hot property isn't fully justified, it's refreshing to report
that the film doesn't cheat its audience...more
Other top films out this
Ghost World ****
My Brother Tom ****
Disco Pigs *****
For reviews and details see:
Film Listings - Full London listings with our easy
to use guide
News from London
Drug Secrets of Britain's Snorty Somethings
- Managers rival students in narcotics league table
Big Screen Welcome to Afghanistan
- Michael Winterbottom to make film on conflict in the Middle
LondonNet Home: The big kahuna
LondonNet News Headlines: Award winning updates from the capital
Guide to London: "The must-see guide for visitors
to London" - msn.co.uk
Hotel Shop: LondonNet's selection of the best
hotels in town
Ticket Shop: Theatre and Music Bookings and Helpdesk
Out on the Town: LondonNet's entertainment listings
Hotelgenie: Fine European city hotels
Win an all-inclusive Theatre package:
£70 worth of Theatre Tokens
1 x Drinks & Programme Voucher
1x Showstopper Voucher
1 x Box of Chocolates
1 x Bottle of Champagne
Return (Standard) Rail Travel for two people
Hotel Accommodation at The Grafton Hotel for two people
Prize courtesy of Theatre Tokens. (http://www.theatretokens.com/)
Qu: Name the on-off female lead of My
HOW TO ENTER: All you have to do is send an email
with your answer and the subject header "Theatre Tokens
NB Include email, telephone number and postal address
(which will only be used for this compie-guaranteed). If you
don't include your address we can't send you the prize!
RULES and INFO: First correct answer out of the Editor's
hat win a prize, details will be sent to the winner. The Editor's
decision is final. Closing Date: 24 November 2001.
Last Issues Competition
(1 November 2001,
Kathy Edge (Surbiton,
AHOY! Readers say their piece:
Send mail to [email protected]
Notes: The Editor reserves the right to amend your contributions
for reasons of elegance, space, legality and plain sheer bloodymindedness.
The following letters have been received direct here at Ahoy!
Talkback or on our News Talkback forum. Join the diverse debate
by sending us an email or posting a message on the forum: http://talkback.londonnet.co.uk/
We welcome your views on any subject, questions about your visit
and of course feedback about the newsletter or website.
Hey, someone is taking Eurostar
on! Here's my story of why I refuse to use them, even after all
this time (and it was, admittedly, a long time ago).
A few years ago when I was
still living in Paris there was this
transport strike in France. Eurostar were unaffected, because
they just used their Belgian and UK hires to keep things going.
Then, the French strikers occupied the Lille switching station
(this is what I was told - whether it's true or not I haven't
a clue). So Eurostar cancelled all trains.
Here's the good part.
Did Eurostar help me get back
home to Paris? Not in the least. The
excuse I got, and I quote: "we are a train company, not
a transportation company". I'd call them something else,
but it's not printable. I got left stranded in London and had
to make my own way back to Paris. They didn't even have the courtesy
to provide numbers for alternative transportation customers -
just this person at a desk saying "go away". Instead
of hiring buses or even pointing us in the right direction so
we could get home and generally taking care of their customers
they just abandoned us, utterly and completely. I had to convince
a local bus company to put on a couple more buses. I guaranteed
they would fill them. As it turned out I almost didn't get a
ticket for those same buses, but that's another story.
I will *never* use Eurostar
again. That total lack of anything
resembling customer service back then makes me unwilling to trust
them again. I'd rather fly, and to be blunt it's almost the same
price. I wrote a letter of complaint to them at the time, and
another one later when I got no reply, and never got so much
as an acknowledgement that anything had been received. Nothing.
They didn't care then, and from what I've heard others saying
since then they only seem to know how to do one form of customer
servicing. Well, screw them.
Of course Eurostar should have
cheap standby and budget fares and should make up reveue by selling
good food and on board facilities like a news paper trolley.A
study of the budget airlines success would show what commonsense
can do.We would all go much more often too.It feels like it's
run by peole wih no imagination.
Help us to help you
We love WORD of MOUTH! Please
keep on helping by recommending LondonNet, AHOY! and Hotelgenie.com
to one of your on-line mates every week. Thanks.
* Forward a copy of AHOY! to
a friend *
Linking to LondonNet:
If you have a London related
website - or publish pages that would interest our readers (no
sex sites or get rich quick schemes please) - send us your URL,
page title, plus a short description and we will place a link
on LondonNet. In return we ask you to link to us - if you haven't
already! Please include the URL for the page on your site where
our link appears. Feel free to use our logo that you can copy
from our homepage:
Please also use this address for links to our site. Thanks.
If you need help with the HTML code here is:
A simple text link:
Virtually, the best guide to London</B>
Or with logo and text:
WIDTH="150" HEIGHT="25" ALIGN="BOTTOM"
NATURALSIZEFLAG="3" BORDER="1" ALT=
"LondonNet"></A><B>Virtually, the best
guide to London</B>
the best guide to London
Just copy and paste the above
HTML into your page's source code!
On-line Hotel Booking - Great value London hotels...
Hotelgenie: Fine European city hotels
London Theatre Tickets: All major shows
Sponsorship of AHOY!
If you want targeted hits for your website, why not sponsor an
issue of AHOY! The LondonNet Newsletter. For info mail us at:
For details of cost effective banner advertising on LondonNet
please email: [email protected]
Subscribe to AHOY! list
To receive AHOY! click
Follow the ListBuilder
link at the foot of this email
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
AHOY! The LondonNet Newsletter is published by Adonis. All Rights