Property Owners to Cash in on Boris’ Giveaway

There’s an infamous derelict office tower down in Colliers Wood that regularly wins Worst Building in London type competitions.

Everyone agrees it’s a terrible eyesore. Nearly everyone wants to see the thing knocked down.

But because it’s so close to Colliers Wood tube station it would have to be taken apart brick by blackened brick for safety’s sake. The owners say that’s too expensive.

Permission has been given for it to be redeveloped into flats. But because of the slump in property prices, the owners say that’s not worth the effort.

In steps Boris Johnson, who is thinking about shoving loads of cash the owners way to help out with the redevelopment. Nice one!

Dear Boris,

I’ve got a huge old non-flat screen TV that dominates the living room. No one likes it anymore. But humping it downstairs would ruin the newly painted walls and, anyway, I don’t fancy shelling out for one of those High Definition jobs until all the channels are broadcast in HD.

I hear you have a scheme for people in my tricky situation. A few grand should cover it. TIA.