Devastated when his latest relationship hits the rocks, Duncan Anderson is on the brink of giving it all up. In a final attempt to find out where it all went wrong (and right) Duncan audits his last five girlfriends and the journey he takes is poignant, funny and at times, deeply bizarre.
Over the last two years Duncan has seen and tried it all; moulding himself into what he thinks is the perfect boyfriend, pretending not to care about ex-boyfriends that haven't quite disappeared and letting go of his British reserve in the hope of becoming more appealing. He's disastrously attempted to give fashion advice, put up with reckless driving and created a secret language. He's even had the courage to take the ultimate risk, saying the three little words…No matter what he tried, Duncan always ended up alone…but that's all about to change.