Londoner

M4 Bus Lane

Work starts today to remove the lane between Heathrow and Brentford that car drivers love to hate. It should be open to all traffic by the end of this week.

M4 Bus Lane

Work starts today on the lane between Heathrow and Brentford that car drivers love to hate. It should be open to all traffic by the end of this week.

Chinese Vase

Found in an attic clear-out in Pinner, north west London, an 18th century Qing Dynasty piece of porcelain fetched £43M at auction. 'They had no idea what they had,' said the auctioneer of the lucky sellers.

Gordon Ramsay

As well as handing the sack to his father-in-law, it has now been revealed that the celebrity chef cooked up similar treatment for his brother-in-law and nephew. 'Why does he want to cut the whole family off?' asked a sister-in-law.

Harrods Advent Calendar

Surprises behind the doors of the 1.75m high calendar for the super-rich include gold sunglasses, a designer kitchen and a speedboat. Sounds a bit like the prize board in Bullseye, but it's yours for only £620,000 ($1M). Act quick, they've only made five.

The Queen

Her Majesty's new Facebook page was flooded with republican messages after its launch yesterday. If the posters are to be believed, the Queen is an 'inbred' 'scrounger' and a 'parasite' to boot.

Lady GaGa

Eight versions of GaGa are being made in London by Madame Tussauds for the waxworks' franchises around the world, all to be unveiled next month. 'She is the perfect subject for the biggest figure launch in Madame Tussauds' history,' said a spokesperson.

Guy Fawkes

The old guy will be the only one not bothered that London's firefighters have called off their strike. Despite plenty of warning, they never seem to save Fawkes' effigy from any bonfires.

Rihanna

Says she's moving to London soon, but before that the Only Girl (In The World) singer is to turn on the Christmas lights at 6.30 this evening at Westfield shopping centre.

Kiera Knightley

The 25 year old actress's Mayfair flat has been ransacked. The thieves made off with two of the Pirates of the Caribbean star's laptops.

Kate Moss

At the Oxford Street branch of Topshop last night to launch the last line - inspired by the 1970s - in her series of designs for the chain store.

The XXXXL Suit

The biggest off-the-peg suit ever seen in Britain has gone on sale. The jacket has a 64 inch chest, the trousers a 60 inch waist. High and Mighty, the suit's makers, say: 'We aim to be a place where people get measured properly for clothes that actually fit.' If they can get through the door.

Charlie Chaplin and the Time Traveller

Filmmaker George Clarke has spotted a cast member in one of the great comedian's movies - The Circus - with what looks like a mobile phone. "It was kind of like, 'Wow, that's somebody that's went back in time'," said Clarke.
Video: Time Travelling Charlie Chaplin Extra

James Bond

007's most famous car - the Aston Martin DB5 - was sold for £3M at Sotheby's in London last night. New owner Harry Yeaggy plans to store it in his private car museum in Ohio.

Martin Broughton

The Chairman of BA who has spoken out about the 'pointless' nature of many security checks at UK airports. He adds that we should cease “kowtowing” to the USA over such measures.